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Friday, December 8th 2017

1:38 PM

We Focus on What’s Important… to Us

Phineas and Ferb is a fun cartoon to watch. I enjoy sitting down with the Wee Ones and eating breakfast as we watch the crazy antics of those boys while their sister tries desperately to bust them only to embarrass herself when everything magically disappears before their mom makes it to the backyard!

In today's episode, there was a machine that created an alternate universe with duplicate characters, and it carried us through until the end when the machine was revealed. Up until then, we had no idea that we were not watching the present reality. To help clarify that it was an alternate universe, Ferb tells us that the duplicate Phineas was wearing a shirt with 4 white stripes while the real Phineas was wearing a shirt with only 3 white stripes!

This blew our minds because we never noticed it. With the magic of the DVR, I had to rewind just to see if that was really what happened. We went back in the episode and sure enough, the duplicate Phineas was wearing a shirt with 4 white stripes! This little detail was there the whole time, but we missed it. How could we miss something so obvious?

We never noticed the shirt with the 4 white stripes because that detail was not important to us.

In life, there are details that escape us for that reason. This is not good or bad, this is just the way it is. If it is important to us, there is no way we would ever miss it, but if it does not matter to us, we don't really care about it. My guess is that this is why we often have different versions of stories from the past. When you hear a different version, you tend to not believe it really happened that way because you don't remember it that way. Perhaps there were some details that escaped you because those details weren't really that important to you.

In relationships, there are many details that may not be important to you, but they could be critical for maintaining peace.

I'm sure that we have all had moments when we have been attacked for something we did not realize we were guilty of. In our world, it could have been a minor offense but in that other person's world, you might as well be the one who ordered the launch of a nuclear missile aimed at the heart of the relationship. Did the person overreact or did you underreact? I guess it depends on which side you are on.

If the detail is not important to you, but it is important to somebody else, you have a choice to make.

In our relationships, no matter what kind of relationship it is, there will be moments when you are at odds with each other, and part of the reason could be the fact that you are placing different levels of importance on certain details. Once you realize this, you need to make a decision about how you will react.

Are you going to act like it was no big deal and demand that the other person "get over it," or will you try to figure out a way to make up for this oversight? If you are the person who was offended, will you demand that the other person apologize and correct the problem, or will you try to see that there is a middle ground that can be reached? This is one of those situations where we need to remember that compromise is not a "4 letter word."

In life, there are many details that are important to some but could be considered optional for others.

As we continue living together on this earth as flawed humans, we need to remember that we are all unique, and that means we will have different opinions about which details are important. Remembering this important detail will help us become a little more flexible with our demands and a little more patient when the other person does not see why you are so upset.

"Blessed are the flexible, for they will never be bent out of shape." (SECC Beatitude)

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